I personally would want people who I know and love while I am alive to forget me and move on with their lives after my death.
It’s like I would be happier in whatever is in the after life to see the people who I cared about happy with their lives, instead of getting sad whenever they remember me or worse yet, remembering me on yearly basis after I am gone.
I genuinely find it very illogical and selfish for people to want everyone to never forget them long after they are gone, especially due to the pain that come with memories.
That is why I am curious about the reason.
You seem to think there are only two outcomes: completely forgotten, or remembered with profound sadness. Those are the self-imposed limitations of one who can’t come to terms with death. Choosing to forget loved ones is a slight to their entire existence. It’s time to realign your thinking. Remember those who have passed on with happiness and joy for what they were. Let their memory bring a smile to your face. That’s how I remember and how I hope to be remembered. Choose celebration not despair.