Kamala Harris’s resounding defeat affirmed the worst of what many Black women believed about their country, even as some looked to the future with a wary determination.
Black women could see the mountaintop.
Across the country, they led an outpouring of Democratic elation when the vice president took over the top of the presidential ticket. But underneath their hope and determination was a persistent worry: Was America ready, they asked, to elect a Black woman?
The painful answer arrived this week.
It affirmed the worst of what many Black women believed about their country: that it would rather choose a man who was convicted of 34 felonies, has spewed lies and falsehoods, disparaged women and people of color, and pledged to use the powers of the federal government to punish his political opponents than send a woman of color to the White House.
I think it’s less about offering specific policies that will help and more about looking them in the eye and saying “I hear you, it’s fucked up. We’ll change everything.” It’s a bit like when my wife has a bad day at work, and when I get home she starts venting. Sometimes I try to cut in and come up with a solution to her problems, but it usually makes things worse. One day she stopped me dead in my tracks, took a deep breath, and said, “Please don’t try to fix it. Sometimes I just need to vent and I want you to tell me you hear me and that you love me. That’s all.” She didn’t want me to offer a solution at all, she just wanted me to actively listen and comfort her.
I think that’s what Trump is doing. He’s engaging them on a human level and validating them as individuals with problems. He’s going to do absolutely fuck all to fix them, but it’s a really powerful level of connection that’s obviously working.