A quarter of UK men over 42 do not have children. When that is not by choice, regret can grow into pain

cross-posted from: https://radiation.party/post/98607

[ comments | sourced from HackerNews ]

There is very little research into men who have not had children, although that is beginning to change. Research by Dr Robin Hadley has found that 25% of men over 42 do not have children – 5% more than women of the same age group.

Half of the men who are not fathers but wanted to be describe a huge grief and isolation from society. Almost 40% have experienced depression and a quarter feel a deep anger.

  • ᴇᴍᴘᴇʀᴏʀ 帝@feddit.ukOPEnglish
    51·
    1 year ago

    I’ve been wondering how realistic it would be for a single guy to adopt, or be a foster parent or something. But considering how stupidly difficult it can be for even well-adjusted, middle class couples to adopt, I’m quite sure it’s unrealistic. Never mind the suspicion and prejudice men face when it comes to caring for kids.

    Indeed. The maternal instinct is something that no-one questions but the desire to be a father is still a bit of a minefield.

    The Guardian has had a few articles on the subject, like this one. This article is the one I remember reading a decade ago now and wondering about going it alone but I was realistic enough to realise that I’d really need a partner for such an endeavour. I’ve got to know myself better since and that increasingly looks like a wise decision. However, I am full of admiration for the guys choosing to go it alone.

    • merridew@feddit.ukEnglish
      51·
      1 year ago

      The maternal instinct is something that no-one questions

      Plenty of women question it.