This is an article about the online communities of people who abstain from masturbation. It discusses the reasons people join these communities and the potential harms and benefits. Some people find these communities helpful in overcoming pornography addiction. However, there is concern that these communities spread inaccurate information and may overlap with extremist groups.

  • Snot Flickerman@lemmy.blahaj.zoneEnglish
    939·
    9 months ago

    “Nothing scares me. Nothing hurts me anymore,” a young YouTuber tells the camera as snowflakes cut across the frame. He is shirtless in a Michigan January, he tells viewers, to make a point about embracing discomfort in order to become a great, powerful man.

    The YouTuber, who goes by the handle iamLucid, tells the camera he can stand the below-freezing temperature because he has been taking cold showers every day and, crucially, hasn’t masturbated to pornography in a year.

    “That’s the most beta thing you can do. That’s the weakest thing any man can do,” he says.

    Like the idiot fucking Boomers before them, these people are preaching putting up with the bullshit you’re abused with as being “strong.”

    Good job being an effective slave you fucking idiot. Good slaves think they’re strong because the abuse they suffer doesn’t bother them.

    Yeah, working forty years for the same motherfucker who keeps paying you less year after year while paying himself more really shows how “tough” you fucking idiots are.

    “I don’t cry when my daddy abuses me,” isn’t the fucking flex you think it is, guys. It means you’re broken, not strong. People who punch dad in the fucking nose and get his abusive ass arrested are strong. People who put up with abuse are weak and broken.

    Good to see young men are just as fucking stupid as their forebears. /s

    Young Men: “Everyone assumes we’re all terrible just because we’re men, we’re not given a chance!”

    Also Young Men: Immediately embrace fucking backwards ass thinking that really justifies the assumption that they’re all fucking terrible by default.

    If they’re trying to prove otherwise, they’re fucking failing because they are god damned idiots obsessed with cro-magnon strength like that matters in the modern world.

    • jpreston2005@lemmy.world
      9·
      9 months ago

      People who put up with abuse are weak and broken

      A hearty and genuine go fuck yourself you moronic piece of shit. Abuse happens in all diff forms and all the responses to it (fight, flight, freeze, fawn) are involuntary.

        • PrincessLeiasCat@sh.itjust.works
          121·
          9 months ago

          “I don’t cry when my daddy abuses me,” isn’t the fucking flex you think it is, guys. It means you’re broken, not strong. People who punch dad in the fucking nose and get his abusive ass arrested are strong. People who put up with abuse are weak and broken.

          This part reminded me of the Behind the Basters episodes on Henry Kissinger. He would routinely get beat up by Nazi kids when he was still in Germany, but once he was an adult he would brag about how it never really bothered him.

          We saw how that worked out.

    • GBU_28@lemm.eeEnglish
      102·
      9 months ago

      Great comment.

      A few things though, some folks enjoy the cold, and cold immersion, and that’s fine. There are some studies that in some people there can be some benefits. Great.

      Also, strength can be very … Empowering. And some folks have legitimate lifestyles where being strong is a major benefit. Great. Seeking to be strong does not make one “cro magnon” in motivation.

      But things like strength/fitness are made in the gym, and in the kitchen. Not in some odd biohack.

      Ultimately, the user’s habits don’t seem like they’re hurting anyone (unless there is context not shared in the quote.) And if so, good for them. Whatever placebo makes them feel confident/happy, good for them. There’s people out there rubbing crystals and imbibing in essential oils lol. Issues only arise if they hurt or discredit others, which, the quote suggests, this user somewhat does. (Shaming those who masturbate).

      • oatscoop@midwest.socialEnglish
        71·
        9 months ago

        Resiliency is incredibly valuable, and being in and working through tough situations is the greatest teacher for it. E.g. “I’ve dealt with worse, this is nothing.”

        But there are definitely healthy and unhealthy ways to gain resiliency. Those tough situations should be a net positive experience, and a something gradually worked up to in a way that doesn’t cause physical/mental harm to one’s self – always in pursuit of something worthwhile.

        Fucked up shit pushed by insecure weirdos on the internet is none of those things.

      • uienia@lemmy.world
        13·
        9 months ago

        Ultimately, the user’s habits don’t seem like they’re hurting anyone

        You are ignoring the OP article which makes it very clear that this movement definitely hurts someone, since it is ideologically linked to the far right, and is a huge right wing pipeline, literally being the cause of hatred and bigotry (at best).

        • GBU_28@lemm.eeEnglish
          2·
          9 months ago

          Read literally a few sentences later. And use some critical thinking.

          The HABITS don’t hurt anyone.

          The BEHAVIOR/SOCIAL CONTEXT is.

          If the dude doesn’t want to jack off, so be it. No problem. If the dude shames others , that’s an issue.

  • Neato@ttrpg.networkEnglish
    463·
    9 months ago

    “I have seen claims on social media saying that semen retention can boost your testosterone levels, cure erectile dysfunction, make you more manly, make you stronger, cure depression, make you more successful, clear your skin,” says Ashley Winter, a urologist who has been publicly critical of nofap ideas.

    “And there is no medical evidence that it does any of those things,” she says, adding that in many male adults, abstaining from ejaculation will merely result in “nocturnal emissions,” or wet dreams.

    Why would your body respond to a perceived glut of mating (your body cannot tell the difference between intercourse and masturbation) with erectile disfunction? That would be a negative response spiral that would ensure extinction. It’s actually the other way around: if functions of your body aren’t getting used, they get cannibalized to save energy. This is why people with penises get erections at night: your body is ensuring it still works. Same reason why nocturnal emissions happen. Your body will ensure you can successfully mate even if you aren’t mating on a regular basis.

  • lennybird@lemmy.worldEnglish
    442·
    9 months ago

    A national poll conducted in late 2022 found that 4 out of 10 Americans believe society has become too “soft and feminine.” Former Fox News host Tucker Carlson did a special for Fox in 2022 called The End of Men, drawing attention to “the decline of manhood, of virility, of physical health, all of which together threaten to doom our civilization.”

    Well that’s fucking depressing but lines up with the MAGA banner comprised of the insecure and ignorant.

    Wonder what society of manliness they want to go back to… Lynchings? The dark ages?

    • AbidanYre@lemmy.worldEnglish
      8·
      9 months ago

      Tucker is one of the last people I would take advice from on, well anything, but masculinity in this case.

    • Tremble@sh.itjust.works
      87·
      9 months ago

      You can actually be a manly man without being complete arse. I understand some of the backlash against feminism. Boys are struggling in our school systems. Title 9 is actually used to admit more young men to colleges now, for decades now actually.

      I can even understand the popularity of some of the pick up artists who are popular among men who are not quite the “ladies man”. Better yourself, find things that help make you a better person. Get a hobby, work out. Make yourself interesting.

      But these right wing pundits are fucking crazy.

      I don’t like the term toxic masculinity (edit: if you are trying to better yourself and you say I don’t want to espouse toxic masculinity, I see that as useful (What i mean is that trying to apply it to anyone who offends or upsets you can be problematic.) other than as an idea discussed among academia, but god damn these asshats.

      • OpenStars@startrek.websiteEnglish
        52·
        9 months ago

        If it helps, there’s a noticeable trend recently - except it’s not just recently and probably hearkens all the way back prior to the dawn of the human species - where people do not mean what they say. I mean… I am being genuine here!:-)

        It highly correlates, though is not exclusive to, people being as dumb as a bag of rocks.

        e.g. Jesus commands “Love everyone - especially those you do not agree with”, and thousands of years prior the Old Testament said things like “the worker deserves their wages” (as well as tiny little details about tassels and the hems of robes and shit like that), hence Karens (male & female alike) ignore all the stuff they want to, while twisting the meaning of whatever they can get their hands on of that to kill people with (taking a handful of words in isolation, discarding the context, often not even finishing the entire fucking sentence - e.g. “there is now therefore no condemnation, for those that walk according to his path” an important if highly inconvenient, for them, part!). For goodness’ sake, the Old Testament literally prescribes a formula for “bitter herbs” to cause an abortion!

        And the people that showed up on January 6? Hint, they weren’t “patriots”.

        So if we use the definitions of an idiot, we are going to come away with a ah … “skewed perspective” of said thing - often 180 degrees in opposition to what it was supposed to mean. Hence, I am totally okay with the term “toxic masculinity”, defined in the Oxford Dictionary as:

        a set of attitudes and ways of behaving stereotypically associated with or expected of men, regarded as having a negative impact on men and on society as a whole.

        And if asshats are misusing it, even abusing it lately? Well, they suck, so why would I give one second’s thought to what they want? :-D

        I hope that perspective helps, or at least is interesting.

  • Xavier@lemmy.ca
    281·
    9 months ago

    I am not sufficiently qualified to comment on this particular sociocultural trends nor can I give medical recommendations. However, some may want to inform themselves by evaluating the current status of relevant research. A number of studies have found that greater ejaculation frequency is associated with a reduced risk of prostate cancer.

    One such research in question :

    Ejaculation Frequency and Risk of Prostate Cancer: Updated Results with an Additional Decade of Follow-up | doi:10.1016/j.eururo.2016.03.027

    • Hardeehar@lemmy.world
      21·
      9 months ago

      I think it’s more the psychology of the nofap group themselves that’s hurtful. I’ve seen many/most discussions that are fine, but others are just wildly toxic with a cult-like “discipline”.

      You’re either with us or against us.

      Us vs. the system/females/people in power.

      You’re better than others. Or, if you trip up, you’re garbage.

      There’s no in-between and no room for mistakes.

      That’s not good for you in the long run and it’ll hurt more than it helps.

      • APassenger@lemmy.world
        16·
        9 months ago

        I was referred to a Huberman YT about sleep. What immediately happened to my feed was astounding and an obvious onramp to toxic masculinity. Jordan Peterson, Joe Rogan, DISCIPLINE, Optimize this and that, Alphas do this, sigmas fail because… And it’s still sorting itself out months later;×I use down votes, not interested and all of that.

        YT makes it easy for people to end up in places they shouldn’t. But I’m sure there are a lot of views along the way.

        That said, balance, discretion and never turning I to a creep who can’t not objectify… Those are traits we should all maintain.

        • LarmyOfLone@lemm.ee
          4·
          9 months ago

          It’s profitable. The AI algorithm knows that many people will comment angrily or start looking for more info. It probably even tracks if you clicked the “not interested” button angrily or truly just disinterested :D

    • Agent641@lemmy.world
      15·
      9 months ago

      You do not maturbate because you want to boost your tostersone.

      I do not masturbate because I am clinically depressed and can’t stay awake long enough.

      straightens tie

      We are not the same

    • IndustryStandard@lemmy.world
      415·
      9 months ago

      Not ejaculating is also linked to higher testosterone. Many fighters do intentionally not have sex or masyurbate masturbate a few days before their fights.

      • astral_avocado@lemm.ee
        151·
        9 months ago

        I think I’ve read that’s only a very temporary decrease immediately after ejaculation, it’s a tough thing to measure over time since you have to draw blood each time. Sports are full of psuedo science and myths.

  • Hyperreality@kbin.social
    816·
    9 months ago

    People like to complain about boomers, but let’s be real here: are the zoomers that much better?

  • jpreston2005@lemmy.world
    415·
    9 months ago

    “Spokespeople of online forums like NoFap, for example, have been very concerned with distancing themselves from anything having to do with extremism,” says Burke. “Alt-right, neo-Nazi, white supremacist, antisemitic — they are very clear to say we are not that. But they’re not willing to recognize what I think is just an empirical reality, which is that some people who buy into porn addiction rhetoric also buy into these more extremist beliefs.”

    dumbest fucking thing I’ve ever read. What? Guys are trying to masturbate less? It’s probably because they’re NAZIS

    • EatATaco@lemm.eeEnglish
      104·
      9 months ago

      . What? Guys are trying to masturbate less? It’s probably because they’re NAZIS

      Holy shit, this isn’t even remote close to what you just quoted actually said.

      • systemglitch@lemmy.world
        47·
        9 months ago

        It does if you read between the lines, because it came off exactly like that to me as well while reading it.

        • EatATaco@lemm.eeEnglish
          93·
          9 months ago

          You’re not “reading between the lines” you’re just making shit up to confirm what you want to believe is true. It doesn’t even remotely say this, they’re saying that they think it’s being co-opted by these right wing groups, and they don’t want that to happen.

    • Blueberrydreamer@lemmynsfw.com
      12·
      9 months ago

      Since I’m sure there will be others who don’t bother to read:

      Nofap communities tend to have a large overlap with extremist hate communities, and are often used to spread harmful and misleading rhetoric.

      There’s also no observable benefit to not masturbating. The proponents portray it as some scientifically proven secret, but it’s the same scam as homeopathy and Gweneth Paltrow’s vagina eggs. Big, vague, impossible to disprove health claims supported by anecdote after anecdote.

      • CaptainBasculin@lemmy.ml
        2·
        9 months ago

        Yes, I did. It tells nothing about why quitting it is bad, and just uses the argument “people spread misinformation”.

        Guess what? The internet’s filled to the brim with misinformation.