• theangryseal@lemmy.world
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    7 months ago

    I exist because my mother told my father that she was taking birth control. My father hasn’t been a part of my life except on a few occasions where he wanted to be here and there, and I don’t hold a grudge. My mom proudly told me this when I was about 9. I don’t blame her either, she raised herself from the time she was 4 years old when her mother committed suicide. She did the best she could with what she had as a person with no education and no parents to guide her.

    My father came for the birth of my oldest biological child. He came for a few Christmases. He showed up when I was going through a divorce and helped me fix a car for my now ex. He didn’t have to do any of that. I barely know him at all, and even though it bums me out from time to time, it is what it is.

    Life is a mess for everybody haha.

    • Shou@lemmy.world
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      7 months ago

      It’s not always the mother being deceptive.

      My mother wanted a child. A family. She was clear about it from the start. My dad didn’t. Probably didn’t communicate it. He didn’t bother using protection either. When my mom got pregnant on the first go, he wanted an abortion. No responsibility.

      He tried to hide his autism from my also autistic mother. They didn’t understand autism back then. She herself considered aborting me out of fear of having a retarded child. She zoned out for weeks, and when she learned I was a girl, she believed god had blessed her. For she thought girls can’t be autistic.

      Lo and behold, my sister and I were neglected intellectually, socially, and emotionally. Because they did not understand parents supposed to teach children, not threaten them with a belt when the kid doesn’t adhere to their autistic whims/expectations.

      We raised ourselves with 0 guidence and am I far behind the average person. They are both not asocial, lonely and happy we exist as a means to reduce their misery.

      They should never have had children. Life is a mess.

      • Fungah@lemmy.world
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        7 months ago

        My father bounced on my mother, thinking me and my twin sister died during childbirth. We were split up to keep.it that way. She grew up like royalty, with everything a child could possibly want or need, while I grew up in the desert with my aunt and uncle, who were both unfortunately killed while.I was in my late teens.

        They’d lied to me about who my father really was after I was reunited with my sister, and the first time I ever met him I found out first hand how cruel he could be and I unfortunately lost my hand in the fray.

        Despite this, he tried everything he could to get me to come work for him and his asshole boss. And mentor.

        Ultimately he redeemed himself when he threw that wrinkled prick.down an 3levator shaft, but died soon after.

        Life’s a mess.