Did they consent to the free sex?

Amazing, enjoy it

Omg same re: skyrim

Learn chess

Masculinity as with all labels, is what we make it to be. Who says it isn’t manly to have strong feelings or to be emotive.

If what you are seeking is emotional maturity, that isn’t especially a gendered concept. It’s something you can work on and build, but I’d recommend trying to mentally uncouple it from being a man. It sounds like a way your mind is beating yourself up for your perceived shortcomings.

Keep working on ways to acknowledge, accept, and let things be. Remind yourself of your goals and your strengths. At times when things get a bit out of control, show yourself compassion and remind yourself you are still working on it.