Wouldn’t it be better to use all that obsidian to build nether portals so we can build a public transit system on the bedrock roof?
Now that you mentioned public transportation the US will never agree to the project
The US would sooner build a gigantic obsidian orb than even think of building high speed rail anywhere.
Can’t be letting the plebs have freedom of movement, now can we ?!
Hey don’t downplay the economic benefits of the LOO (Large Obsidian Orb)
Honestly why don’t we have a nether portal transit system already. Server is how old at this point? Smh my head.
Ok but has anyone actually tried it yet? You could be the first
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Or maybe we can feed the homeless obsidian?
I’m pretty sure at that size the obsidian eats homeless.
They placed it right next to Bay Bridge too, a place in dire need of traffic decongestion.
Turns out it’d be a dissapointingly small sphere:
US annual defence budget = $800 billion
2% = $16 billion
Obsidian cost per kg = $5
Total kg in budget = 3.2 billion kg
Density of obsidian = 2.6 g/cm3 = 2600 kg/m3
Total volume of sphere = 3.2b/2600 = 1230769 m3
Volume of sphere = 4/3 π r^3
Radius = (3V/4π)^(1/3) = 66.48 m
The sphere would only stand at 133m tall, I propose we instead utilise the entire defence budget for a much more skyscraper like 490m tall orb
Nobody said it had to be a solid sphere, how else would you get it to emit the ominous hum without attuning its natural frequency by carefully designing the thickness of the obsidian layer?
ignores engineering and construction cost. but we can assume that all people involved would work for free, because its a massive honour
Obsidian Orb is really Roko’s Basilisk. Allowing you to live is your payment for building it.
Well that’s assuming it’s completely solid and not hollow. Hollow would probably be pretty huge, although the structural rigidity might not be great. Maybe we make a giant obsidian 3D printer and print it at like 10-15% infill.
An obsidian 3d print is less crazy than you might think. It’s essentially rapidly cooled lava.
Need something to hold the lava, then pressurize it to squeeze it through a nozzle that that has attached cooling units.
I think you just described a volcano.
We’re in luck! They already sell that nozzle!
Simple: bucket of lava, bucket of water, repeat.
Grabs a bucket. Quick, to the lava depository!
less crazy than you might think
Using a planet for a 3d printer’s nozzle still sounds pretty crazy.
You’re assuming one year of budget. I take it as 2% per year and something of that size would likely take 10+ years to build out.
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It would also crack instantly. Obsidian’s not durable.
yeah right. it takes a long time to mine, even with a diamond pickaxe
Why should it crack?
Because Obsidian is really fragile. Maybe a bird hits it by accident, shatters the whole thing.
What if it were egg shaped
Then the bird would probably sit on it I think
Would it be a pretty bird?
That is obviously nonsense. A bird hitting any large structure will not break it.
No way. Birds are stronger than you think. Woodpecker would demolish that thing.
And it’s literally also called volcanic glass due to its properties resembling glass. Which I would imagine means it’s brittle and prone to shatter.
Found the shill for Big Limestone.
My only question is why we didn’t build the orb back in the Eisenhower administration when it was most needed.
Congress had a huge Anti-Ǒ̴̰̘̲̭̿͑̒̒͐̀̋̕͜r̷̡͍̼̹̥̻͖̤̅͑͌̋͌͗b̶̡̛͈̺̬͙̰̙͖̘͔̳̲̦̦͖̄͆̃͂͆͠ caucas after WWII. It’s a miracle we got the Ǒ̴̰̘̲̭̿͑̒̒͐̀̋̕͜r̷̡͍̼̹̥̻͖̤̅͑͌̋͌͗b̶̡̛͈̺̬͙̰̙͖̘͔̳̲̦̦͖̄͆̃͂͆͠s we did.
Oh, you mean like the one in Cincinnati?
Chicago stretched theirs
B E A N
Would be a far better use of the ‘defense’ budget than what they’re currently spending it on.
Thats funny because more than 2%, more like 40%, of our defense budget is going into a black orb never to be seen again and is completely unaccounted for.
I have the feeling that if we shook execs at Raytheon and Lockheed upside down for long enough a fair amount of that would fall out.
Why would it hum and am I taking this too seriously?
That’s the best part - nobody would know!
But even so, if you were wise, you would hum as well.
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Lay your pipe yourself.
Large homogenous objects make noise. Most theories i’ve heard think it’s a result of vibration/internal stresses.
But is the joke that it will hum because that feature is money well spent, or because a large orb just does because of science, or because it just does and no one knows why?
Well because it comes out of the defence budget it would be a military installation and therefore the hum is classified
I think you’re not taking it seriously enough. The number of benefits from this would be immense.
Think of all of the use we got out of the Omaha Cube! And it only whistles!
Why wouldn’t it hum?
2b2t players:
I support this project.
It should go on top of Devil Mountain, it has one of the largest viewsheds in the western US.
If we’re ok with relocating it outside of California, let’s put it on top of Devil’s Tower and call it the world’s largest Gazing Ball garden ornament.
No, we should put the quartz one on Devil’s Tower and it will be the world’s largest crystal ball. Fortunes could be told for miles.
Just imagine the size we could build if we used all of the defense budget. It’s resonant frequency would blow the eardrums of everyone on the West Coast and kill all marine life. One day when I’m presadent…
I don’t think “resonance frequency” means what you think it does.
Sure I do, its when the Acoustic suspension and the harmonic distortion collide creating a Bass Reflex that shakes your ass.
I don’t think that’s right, but I don’t know enough about magnets to say otherwise
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Something one might propose to build in Night Vale.
Please do not disregard the obsidian sphere in the Night Vale public swimming pool. Make sure to give it all due attention. But not too much attention, so as to make things weird. Too little attention, unfortunately, will also bring about its ire, and we all remember what happened last time. Simply apply the recommended amount of regard to its ominous, strangely comforting hum, as it gently lulls you to sleep.
And now: the weather.
Wow. Nice to meet you, Cecil. Big fan. Please don’t ask me to work as an intern.
Nice to meet you, Big Fan. There are many properties of your anatomy I believe the sheriff’s secret police would find useful. I’ll recommend you to their internship program, which is compulsory and slightly moist.
There have been reports of a large black orb near the dog park. Ignore them. There is no orb. Nor is there a dog park. Besides, mysterious, humming orbs are nothing to worry about anyway. So why are you bothered by these reports? And now, the weather:
In fact, I would much rather live in a community where a wholesome, humming orb would be a welcome sight. If people report every single ominous orb that they see, why, there would be less majesty in this world. That sounds like the kind of austere, silent community that Desert Bluffs wants to be, and do we really want that to be the place we call home, dear listener?
Come to think of it, just who are these people who would busy themselves submitting frivolous reports an ominous orb? Could it be Jan? Jan, who takes it upon themselves to scold the children for looking at the solar eclipse? What else don’t you want us to see, Jan?
In 2022, the defense dept spent 590billion dollars, 2% of that would be 11.8 billion dollars. While it is impossible to calculate the cost of constructing this sphere, it cost 25 billion dollars to develop the Airbus A380, and 150 Billion to complete the International space station.
The US defense budget isn’t an infinite pool of money. It’s 15% of the federal budget. It’s dwarfed by healthcare spending (27%), and Social Security (24%). I’m not a war hawk, I try to bring this up in lefty spaces because skimming off the defense budget to solve social problems is a common, and silly belief.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/United_States_federal_budget#Major_expenditure_categories
The military budget is massive, not just because a ton of money gets wasted, but because the US has a large military presence across the entire planet. Even if most of the money goes to waste, that’s still enough to outspend every other military on earth. At the same time, SS is a massive project of direct payments to seniors, Medicare is massive and made more expensive by our shitty healthcare system, and US tax rates are low compared to their peak.
Tons of companies and rich people pay negative overall taxes, even though their activities cause costly externalities to society. More than not paying their fair share, they actually pass off large bills to everyone by not paying the full costs of their business. All because US foreign policy works to spread and maintain global capitalism instead of a rule based world order like they claim, incentivizing countries to offer competitive (low) tax rates. Economic interreliance disincentivizes international wars, but it causes economic suffering that fuels nationalism which incentivizes wars, civil conflict that can turn into civil wars, and undermines democracy in favor of plutocracy. Fucking utopian capitalists.
Note also absent from the defense spending budget is actual necessary gear for the troopers, such as proper helmets that protect from IED concussions and proper treatment from the DVA for TBI, of which we have hundreds of thousands of cases thanks to twenty years of War on Terror.
Recruits are entirely expendable, according to how our budgets are allocated, which is one of the primary points of counter-recruitment. Roll a D20 for every year of your term, and on a critical fumble, you either die or, way more likely, sustain a life-ruining wound. And those are the ones they count rather than PTSD cases they send back into the fray, the rape cases they make disappear or the troopers who wash out because a senior officer has a personality conflict with them and deigns to personally make their lives a living hell until they break.
In my own work with vets, all these stories have been commonplace, not just isolated incidents.
So yeah, if we’re not going to treat our troops like human beings worthy of life, we can assume defense dollars are going to the cigars that Lockheed-Martin lobbyists hand out to our Senators to celebrate new contracts.
YOU’RE RUINING IT FOR ME!
And eventually someone will spray graffiti really high up somehow
Coca Cola ad*
Hell yeah, ominous hum!
