In recent weeks I have met a pretty and sweet girl with what I consider her only biggest problem: her IQ. She is slow, does not remember things and has no concentration at all, has no arguments, systematically repeats the usual twenty words. (A bit like the character of Forrest Gump, for those who do not know what low iq means). I feel like I like it to go deeper, but I wonder if it’s not a mistake. Do you have similar experiences?
Means that when talking together there is a lack of sharing and as an answer you receive only monosyllables as: Yes, no or OK.
Maybe she doesn’t want to talk to you? Or she’s just quiet, has social anxiety, etc. a million explanations. Not sure why you’re assuming intelligence of someone who you don’t know that well.
I’m not assuming, she showed up saying she had an intellectual decifict, a certified disability. I am a volunteer and I can recognize people with a disability, it is not the fantasy or stereotype any, this person lives in a reality of disability. Is that clear? is it possible that it is not clear and should be an impression? We talk everyday, the disabled exist, are certified and recognize. I like her, she’s sweet and pretty, not quiet, not anxiety, as a friend she’s perfect, her intellectual disability is not relevant, but in an intimate relationship I think there are other considerations, so the question.
There are so many red flags here. And yes, I know ID exists, I used to work with the population. You don’t sound like you respect this person though.
Do you give her a chance to talk?
I don’t get intellectual stimulation from my SO usually, to whom I’m married. Originally, I thought she was kinda dumb. Turns out, the stuff I find fascinating she finds intensely boring. And the stuff she finds fascinating I find absolutely disgusting. Like I’m getting an MBA and she’s getting a masters in midwifery.
For you, giving her a chance to talk about the things she finds interesting might help you discover where her strengths are, where she feels comfortable.
I think we are at different levels of understanding, as many other users cannot see what is the intellectual disability is. I’ve known this person for almost eight weeks,we talk everyday, she’s not stupid, she doesn’t do anything stupid, but she has an intellectual disability.
One word answers for any amount of time doesn’t itself suggest an intellectual disability though.
What else does she do? What is she interested in?